This Is How We Do

So todays 30 minute workout was interesting...

I had initially planned to walk the dog again. Nothing exciting. Because excitement isn't my thing.
Introvert life. Yeeeeee.

Upon donning my poorly matching workout gear (it's dog walking, not a fashion show damnit)
a friend rang and said she was on her way. Aw. Oh well, friend catch ups, ain't nothing wrong wit dat. Will walk the dog later. Catch ups extended far longer than I intended and before I knew it it was school pickup time. Bother, no dog walking for me. (I prefer to walk alone, bringing the kid along wasn't an option)

So I turned to my BFF YouTube.
I'll have one 30 minute yoga workout please Mr Tube.

I typed it in and picked the one that had beginners in the title, because I'm probably less than a beginner to be honest.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPkNZwTFpxU

I was greeted by textbook "relaxing" music, a turbo babe on a yoga mat and then the voice of ...maybe Hugh Hefner? I don't know, he sounded like an old dude who is tired of your shit.

So I did my tubby, unflexible attempt at yoga and it was fine, I'm not particularly balanced yet, but I'll keep working on that.
Then it came to my faaaavourite part of yoga.
Savasana!
Or, in English, the corpse pose!
That's where you lie the fuck down and do all but fall asleep.
So the video told me to do savasana and I was just laying there with my eyes closed, chilling out, pretending to be a corpse. But then at some point I realised the video had stopped and hadn't advised me it had stopped. So who knows how long I was a corpse for.

Upon rising from the dead, another video had popped up.
30 minute dance workout.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tj9d6aBOzDo

Go on then.

I like dancing, I'm pretty good at it. I got nowhere to be.

Let me say. I am glad no one was around to see this train wreck.

Have you ever noticed how white I am?
No neither.
NOT UNTIL THIS WORKOUT VIDEO.

Good lord I am uncoordinated.
These moves weren't even that complicated.
But I powered on through that mother.
I pretended I was looking in a mirror instead of at a TV. Like fuck yeah I am an Indian GODDESS.
Look at my sexy abs and bewitching eyes. Fall under my spell bitches. Yeeeeee.

There was commentary throughout the video from the resident Goddess herself. She was actually kind of aggressive at some points. I almost took it personally. MOVE IT! KEEP UP! she bellowed at me in a stern voice.
Yes Miss, sorry Miss.

It was high energy and it definitely got my heart rate up. After my 1 minute water break allowance my Indian beauty told me we were moving on to the best part, the Bollywood phase!

Wait what.

Ok GO.
Just kidding. There was no instruction and they just danced like it was a competition.

I couldn't keep up so I literally gave my TV the fingers and had my own dance party for the last 5 minutes.

Day 2
Done and dusted.